Wanna Go Gotta Go: A PNM's Guide to Recruitment

Carol Rector
Dec 22, 2023
12 min read

Calling all PNMs! Feeling excited, confused, or nervous about going through formal recruitment? Well, you're not alone. This PNM's Guide to Recruitment has got just what you need to succeed and find your home at VT Panhellenic. Keep reading for outfit inspo, advice from inside, and tips on everything you need to know from yours truly, Alpha Chi Omega!

Written by Carol Rector - December 2023

Panhellenic recruitment at Virginia Tech is such an exciting time, but can often be met with nerves and anxiety for a lot of PNMs. That's okay! If anyone understands the feelings associated with recruitment, it's the girls who've been through it before. So, here is the cheat sheet for success when it comes to all things recruitment.

Keep reading to find out!

Let's get right into what everyone's thinking ... "but what do I do and what do I wear?!" Well, worry no further. Here is your guide on how to put your best foot forward for every round of recruitment.

Open House Round

Open House round is the first round of recruitment, and just recently, Virginia Tech's Panhellenic Council has made it entirely video-based. Only lasting one day, chapters will watch the videos that each PNM made, and you will gather with your Rho Gammas and the rest of your group to watch each chapter's recruitment video and rank them according to your thoughts. These videos are meant to show off each house's personality, as well as transparently outline their financial obligations to keep you completely in the loop about what you would be signing up for if you joined their chapter.

As for outfits, really anything goes! Think - comfy, casual, cute. Sweaters, leggings, jeans, or a cute sweatshirt are all great. Pick something that you will feel good while sitting with the girls in your Rho Gamma group and making your first decisions on where your home will be. There's no one to impress today, so just be yourself and be comfortable!

Philanthropy Round

Philanthropy Round is your first taste at the recruitment experience, and probably your longest two days due to the amount of houses you'll have on your schedule. But don't fret, there is so much to be excited about during philanthropy round. At each house you visit, the chapter gets a chance to show off all the amazing work they do for the philanthropy that they are affiliated with.

Every chapter is so passionate about the events they host around campus and the money they raise each semester. Before each house you visit, it is a good idea to do some light research about each chapter's philanthropy and local organization they support. Seeing someone who went through the trouble to research their organization can go a long way. Nothing too in depth is necessary, but it is good to be informed enough to ask valuable questions to show your interest, especially if you have any personal connections to any of the philanthropies. Chapters value personal connection as someone who will wholeheartedly support their cause.

As for outfits, philanthropy round is slightly more dressy than open house round. This round is two days of fun, so be sure to have two outfits prepared. All PNMs will receive a Panhellenic t-shirt to wear for both days that is usually a neutral color so it will go with whatever you choose to wear with it. The outfit collages shown here can serve as some inspiration. PNMs should wear something along the lines of nice pants, a short skirt, or a long skirt with their provided shirt. Shoes can be similar to a ballet flat, short or tall boots, or even a casual wedge heel. In all, outfits should be put together without having the appearance of being too dressy. But most importantly, it is crucial to wear something that showcases your personal style! This is your first chance to show the chapters who you are in person, so make your clothes part of your image. Have fun with it!

Most of all, during philanthropy round, it is important to give each conversation your full attention, no matter if it is your first house of the day or your last. You never know who you will talk to, and your feelings may surprise you! Keep an open mind when doing your rankings and don't forget to take notes on your conversations, feelings, and overall impressions after each house you visit to help keep things straight in your mind.

Sisterhood Round

Sisterhood round is, in my opinion, the most fun of them all. At each house you visit, the chapter gets to show you a glimpse inside their sisterhood - a chance to show you what makes them unique. Pay special attention to the friendships and family lines that they choose to showcase, because you could soon be a part of them!

Each chapter houses a unique group of girls and therefore a unique personality. Before you begin, make sure that you have thoughtfully considered why you wanted to join a Panhellenic sorority in the first place and what kind of girls you are looking to connect with. The question, "what are you looking for in a sisterhood?" is one to be prepared for this round. Create a response that is true to your reasons for going through recruitment - whether it be to find girls who will be your mentors as well as your companions, to expand your support system at school, or to find the lifelong friends you've always needed. When talking to the chapter women, be honest and open about your friendship experiences in the past, from how you interact with your best friend to some friendships that maybe didn't go your way, and they will be too.

Sisterhood round is a great way to grow connections and find other women who have similar interests and personalities. Another great way to show the chapters who you are is, of course, through your outfits. Sisterhood round is two days long and slightly dressier than philanthropy round. Again, the collages shown here can serve as some inspiration. PNMs should wear short, casual, or sun dresses of their choosing, or even opt for a stylish pantsuit. As for shoes, they are slightly more dressy, including tall or short boots, wedges, thickly-blocked heels, or even stilettos with any kind of personal flare you wish. However, remember that these are all simply suggestions. As long as you look presentable, feel confident, and feel good about the image of yourself that you are portraying to the chapters, you will be just fine. The greatest recruitment outfit inspiration of all is to be unapologetically yourself through your clothes.

For me, sisterhood round was when I realized where my home was. I remember my conversations so vividly with the girl who would eventually become my big. Though it may not be the same case for you, sisterhood round is a special time for everyone, because it gives us a chance to see just how much love and adoration that the women of the Panhellenic community have for each other, and how excited they are to be able to share it with every PNM.

Preference Round

Preference round is where things get real. You're down to your final one or two houses and the nerves are through the roof! Hopefully, you are satisfied with the houses you have left, because each house is SO excited to have you and are determined to show you why you belong in their chapter. This is their chance to show you parts of their history and what really makes their organization special.

A more serious round for sure, preference round makes the conversations you have all the more deep and connective. You will have a longer time to talk to the girl you are paired with in hopes that you can truly make a connection with her and see yourself fitting in with the members of their chapter. Preference round is such a special time and is one you will likely remember even after you join a chapter. Hopefully, your conversations and experiences during this round will help you make the final decision on how to rank your remaining houses and see where you really feel in your bones that home is for you. Though tensions are high and everyone is doing some deep reflecting on the course of the week, let this also be an exciting time of promise for the future of your journey at Virginia Tech and your life as a whole. Good things are coming!

As for outfits, preference round is the most formal of all. Out of respect for the chapters and all the hard work they have done to find the girls for them, and out of respect for yourselves for all the hard work you have done all week searching for your home, everyone is dressed in their best. PNMs should wear nice cocktail dresses, long dresses, or any kind of elegant getup with whatever sparkles, silks, or frills you desire. Let these collages serve as inspiration. Pair your dress or pantsuit with a dressy pair of heels that you love - don't worry, you can always change back into your slippers between rounds! But most of all, be sure that your outfit reflects who you are, because it is your very last chance to show it to the chapters. Make a strong impression and put your best foot forward. You got this!

Make preference round a round to remember, and do your best to have meaningful conversations that you can use to make your decisions about where you think you fit best in a sisterhood. Remember how you felt on that first day and compare it to how far you have come. You've gotten this far - let's make it count.

Bid Day

The big day is finally here! Bid day is the most exciting part of the whole recruitment process, not only because all the long days of talking and dressing up are behind you, but because you get to find out where you will soon call home. Get excited!

As for outfits, wear something along the lines of what you wore for Open House round: comfy, casual, and cute. Be sure to also wear a tank-top, camisole, or something underneath your shirt that makes it easy to change out of a sweater or sweatshirt ... because your new chapter will probably have merch for you!

All in all, though this is a lot to take in, what you wear does not define your recruitment experience. The most important part of this week is the conversations you will have and the connections you will make and turning those into a sisterhood. However, if you do need more outfit inspo, you can also check out @vtpanhellenic on Pinterest!

Advice

Now that we've been through all the logistics, let's get into how everyone is feeling: nervous! Here is a list of some helpful tips to keep your mindset steady, and some advice from girls who have been in your shoes and know the feelings all too well.

Remembering that all of the women you speak to in each chapter have been exactly where you are now is so important to keep things in perspective. Below is some advice from one of Alpha Chi's own members who went through formal recruitment last year, Emma Patterson!

"Starting a new life chapter feels like diving into the great unknown, right? That’s exactly how I felt during recruitment week—a total rollercoaster of emotions. Coming from a small school, with just 30 people in my class, I was excited to meet new people and make more friends! My momma taught me from a young age that "home is not a place, it's a feeling." I kept these words with me through recruitment as guidance, and now I am sharing them with you, in hopes it will help you find the chapter that fits you best."

"Whenever I started feeling jittery or uncertain, I’d hold onto that belief. Home, I realized, isn’t just about four walls; it’s a mash-up of emotions—love, belonging, and solid support. Now I picture the first day of recruitment—buzzing with crazy good energy that’s still etched in my brain. We were all dressed up & psyched to make new connections. Virginia Tech had already become like home to me, sure, but it was within AXO that I truly clicked. Laughs flowed, and it felt like I was talking with an old friend every conversation I had. It felt like I was hanging out with all my friends from high school rather than a room full of strangers."

"Among all those moments, there was this one conversation, this one connection that stood out—this girl who’d later turn out to be my big. And gosh, she’s had such a huge impact on my life, way more than I ever imagined. Looking back, those early connections and finding my spot in AXO fills me with so much gratitude. So get pumped, and remember—home really is a feeling. I am so excited for all of you, and I am looking forward to meeting each and every one of you!"

It is so inspiring to hear how our sisters found their home. We love you, Emma!

Tips and Tricks

Finally, here are some heartfelt tips and tricks for keeping everything straight during such a crazy time. Remember that you are not alone and there are always people who are willing and excited to help you every step of the way.

Figure out why you want to be in a sorority. Use this reason to ground you and guide you through your process, keep it in mind every day. By keeping it at the front of your mind, you are more likely to have

meaningful conversations with girls that will help you fulfill your goal.

Be open about your reason to the girls that you talk to, many of them probably have the same feelings or can help you find the people that do.
Trust in your Rho Gammas and use them as a resource, they are there for you in any way you may possibly need, and they have been through such a long process of training and disaffiliating from their chapters all just to help you find your home.

Come in with a clean slate. Do not begin the recruitment process having your heart set on any one house. Try and have as little preconceived notions about the chapters as possible, no matter what you hear from other people, your friends, or anything you see online. Your personal experience talking to the girls that make the chapter what it is, is the only thing that should factor into your decisions.

Everyone has unique experiences and talks to different people, recruitment is an individual experience meant to find YOU a home in which you can be the happiest, realest, most unapologetic version of yourself, not anyone else.
Though it may be hard, try your best to keep your rankings each night and your results each morning to yourself. It's hard not to share your feelings with the friends you make, but it is the best way to let everyone choose the house that is truly right for them.

Be prepared for the reality of rejection. Everyone is going to be dropped - that's just part of the process. Do your best to find the peace within it. Every door that closes just turns your attention to another door that is wide open. It happens to everyone, you won't be alone! Be excited about the houses you have and make the best of your experience.

Don't immediately write off a chapter just because it wasn't the one you had your heart set on. Most Panhellenic women you talk to can all tell you - they probably didn't end up in the chapter that their PNM self thought they would!
Staying mentally strong and confident in yourself is so important during recruitment. It is so easy to get bogged down in the personal aspects of rejection, like "did she not like me? I thought we were having a great time!" SO many things in recruitment are not personal, lots of things just come down to numbers and logistics, and so many girls in each chapter will be just as devastated as you when certain people don't make the cut.
REMEMBER: there are always other ways to recruit if things really don't go your way. Continuous Open Bidding is a much more laid-back process that lots of girls take advantage of after not feeling satisfied after formal recruitment. That being said, still make the most out of your formal recruitment experience and give every single house a chance until the end. No matter what ends up happening, remember that everything happens for a reason, and whatever is meant for you will always find you!

Always be yourself. No matter your reasons for going through recruitment and even your feelings and nerves regarding the experience, the MOST important thing to remember is to be truly and unapologetically yourself in every conversation you have. Leave all your anxious notions at the door before you walk in a house and just be you.

To really find your home, you have to let go of the 'Pinterest board' version of yourself you see in your head - how 'cool' you want to be, who you want to dress like, how many Instagram followers you have - and really focus on the people you connect with on a personal level. If you're going to go through this long, strenuous, stressful process, it better be to find the girls that are truly going to be your best friends, not the girls that you idealize yourself with.

Straight from the Author:

To me, laughter is the biggest sign that told me I had found my home. When I talked to the girls at Alpha Chi, I found myself shedding that 'Pinterest board' shell that I had worn all week and found myself laughing and telling funny stories more than asking scripted questions and forcing tired smiles after a long day. I found myself feeling relieved in conversation, feeling like I could let loose and be myself, feeling like I could talk to these girls all day long. The time I had with them flew by and I didn't want to leave. I remember walking down the hill and smiling bigger than I had smiled all week, a few tears welling up in my eyes. Everyone says that when you know, you know, but it seems so cheesy and I never thought that would happen to me, but it had. I had an overwhelming feeling that this was what had been missing in my life for so long - that Alpha Chi was home for me.

We hope that each and every one of you finds your home and that you remember that everything really does happen for a reason and what is meant for you will always find you!

From all of us at Alpha Chi to you, GOOD LUCK and GO PANHELLENIC!

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